


Say Something

by Aranei



Series: We live with the choices we make [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-23
Updated: 2015-08-23
Packaged: 2018-04-16 19:52:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4638117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aranei/pseuds/Aranei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes you just have to say goodbye</p>
            </blockquote>





	Say Something

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Camelot Drabble prompt Expecting.

“Shave your beard woman,” Leon delivered the punch line.

Arthur leaned his head back and laughed. “Thank god for you Leon. I don’t know if I would survive this otherwise.”

“Oh come on, Arthur, it’s just your family,” Leon smiled.

“Right, right.” Arthur rolled his eyes. 

Gwen came up beside him and slipped an arm around his waist. She leaned close, “Ok, you have to tell me who is who.” 

Arthur smiled down at her and spoke low. “Ok, red hair by the couch is Father’s sister, Annis. Next to her is Cenred, her son. The blond man is Mother’s brother, Tristan..” 

Gwen interrupted him, “And his wife is Drea and their daughter is Morgause.” 

Arthur nodded. “Her husband is guy with the droopy mustache, Cedric.” 

“Boy with curly hair?” Gwen asked. The doorbell rang at that moment. 

Arthur moved out of Gwen’s hold. “I’ll get that.” He gestured with his head. “Leon?”  
As he stepped away he could hear Leon telling Gwen about Mordred and Kara. As his mind flipped through the missing he speculated that at the door was either Agravain or Finna. A look of genuine surprise crossed his face as he opened the door.

“Not who you were expecting I take it?” Merlin plastered a smile on his face.

“We’re having a family get together right now.” Arthur stated leaving the words ‘for the engagement’. Not sure why Merlin would be there he squashed down whatever guilt he felt.

Merlin shifted on his feet. It was now or never, not that he was expecting anything from Arthur but he had to see him, let him know. He had tried but he couldn’t just leave without saying something and perhaps secretly… but that was stupid of him to think. “It will only take a moment.”

Something about the way he spoke or held himself made Arthur agree. “Let’s talk out front.” He stepped out the door pulling it shut and then moved over onto the little porch. 

Merlin swallowed nervously and stuffed his hands into his pockets. He would never tell that he had chosen this moment. He knew full well that Arthur couldn’t just leave and that he wouldn’t make any kind of scene in front of his family. 

“So what do you want?” Arthur felt confused as to why Merlin was here, now.

He took a deep breath and stared at the man in front of him for a moment, attempting to memorize the handsome face, the blue eyes, firm jaw, golden blond hair. “I wanted to tell you in person that I’m leaving.” Merlin looked down at the ground for a second before looking back up. 

Arthur furrowed his brows. “Leaving, like on a trip?”

“Uhh no. I’ve taken a new position,” he looked at Arthur trying to hold back any hope.

“Oh.” Arthur didn’t know what to say. He had given up any right to say anything but Merlin had stayed and he had taken what little bit of him he could get. But now. A part of him wanted to grab him and never let go. 

Merlin felt with each passing second that he had made the right choice despite the pain of it. “I’m driving to London tonight and my flight leaves in the morning.”

A thousand questions, thoughts flitted through his mind but the only thing that sticks is _I won’t be seeing Merlin anymore._ He stares at him, speechless. 

Merlin has taken a hand out of his pocket and is rubbing the back of his neck. “I probably won’t make it back for the wedding.” He swallows hard after saying that. He waits a moment for Arthur to say something, anything, but all he does is nod his head. He had already pushed back, squashed down the fantasy he had where Arthur begged him to stay. He knew that would never happen but he had at least been expecting Arthur to say something. “Goodbye Arthur.” He looked at him for a moment more before he turned to walk away.

“Will I ever see you again?” Arthur’s voice was as steady as he could make it. He deserved this, this sudden heart stabbing pain. He was the coward The one who denied everything he was, is, threw away his happiness and hurt the person he had cared most about, still cares about. 

He wants to be mean and hurtful, hurl words meant to wound. Arthur had broken his heart and if he was truthful at least with himself it was still all just sort of taped back together with a piece or two gone. But he couldn’t let the last time he saw Arthur be about that. He didn’t turn around to look at him. The words that slipped out of his mouth were as much truth as he could muster. “I don’t know but I don't think so.”


End file.
